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It's National Stress Awareness Month. Just knowing that makes me more acutely aware of how much LESS stress I have in my life than I previously did.
Used to be that I looked for opportunities to add more stress to life; mistakenly believing that it wasn't hurtful....it was exciting! Sure, I'll see 3 more patients this week, drive 100 miles a day round trip and of course I'll be ready to go out on the town on Friday night. Can't let anyone down, now can I?
Those were the days when I routinely worked 60 hours a week. I raised three wonderful kids but didn't spend near enough time with them because of all my "obligations". I didn't learn to say "no" for many years, regrettably missing out on many special moments I'll never get back.
Stress finally kicked my butt when I suddenly started having rashes all over my body and ran an occasional fever. Sure, it was a stressful time in my life...I was getting remarried, trying to blend a family that didn't want blended, starting a new job, dealing with a challenging ex-husband. What doctors initially diagnosed as "chronic poison ivy" turned out to be Lupus.
Lupus thrives on stress. There are times when things are very stressful that I can actually feel the toxins moving through my body, burning & aching, sucking up all my energy. I continued to try to live my regular lifestyle, working & playing too hard. There was one day in particular that I recall literally falling to the floor when trying to leave the house for work. My body simply gave up. Years went by with me struggling to find a way to accommodate Lupus and slowing down. Ironically, one of my duties as an occupational therapist was to help people adjust to changes in their bodies & lifestyles, teach them to pace themselves and adapt. I sucked at taking my own advice.
Again, Lupus decided to kick my behind to get my attention. I had a small stroke that affected my left side. I refused to get help for it, giving myself therapy and hiding the symptoms. I got most of my muscle strength & coordination back, but was left with residual memory problems. This really affected my ability to do my job well and REALLY affected my self-esteem. All of the sudden, I felt dumb. I had a hard time making change at the drive-thru's. I couldn't remember appointments, much less do the paperwork for my job. Eventually, I applied for disability and finally got it after fighting for it for 3 years.
Now I live a fairly stress-free life. In fact, I sometimes get stressed out at how to fill the hours of this stress-free life.
A 25 year old woman saved her children before dying in a fiery car crash on the highway here in El Paso. The wreck occurred at the exit my daughter takes every day as she drives home from work. Wednesday evening the front left tire of her SUV blew out & rolled onto its side and slid across three lanes before stopping.
The mother's leg was pinned in the vehicle when it caught fire. She could not escape, but her maternal instincts kicked in as she handed her two children to a man, a Good Samaritan who stopped to help. The 8 year old is in the hospital with 3rd degree burns and the 4 year old was treated for minor injuries.
She was studying nursing in hopes of giving her family a better life. The mother was 2 months pregnant.
While watching my grandchildren laughing and playing, I started crying at the thought of this young mother. How will the children get over this harrowing experience? I think about the excitement and anticipation that this little family had about the baby that would join them in a few months. I think about how quickly it was all taken away. Did they have big plans for Easter egg hunts? A family cookout? I am thankful for my healthy, happy family. And I will say extra prayers for this family tonight and many nights to come.
